VoodooDoll@ : the voodoo doll enjoys site maintenance, guttering candles, and lurking in the shadows cast by tall trees under a full moon. Nobody ever got slapped by a voodoo doll, but if you start poking pins in one, somebody - somewhere - will know about it very fast. And they're liable to get cranky.

Despite being made of fabric and fluff, and embedded with pins, the voodoo doll does a surprising amount of hands-on work for the group.

QueenofSpades@ : the Queen of Spades rules a secret tribe which does not hail from the Amazonian rainforest. She has graced thewrongpeople.com with her regal assistance in order to get the pretty things that she wants.

Well, it's just common sense, isn't it?

DirtyFilthy@ : No job is too big, too dirty, or too filthy. This man-slash-animal (or manimal, if you will) will do anything, from eating a whole magazine to cracking skulls...you know, the small ones you can buy from the $2 shop.

Godfather@ : the Godfather would like to inform all insecure young women who are seeking greater meaning in life that he would consider it a personal pleasure to give them that greater meaning, all night long.

He'd like to, except that he'd rather have the secure, smart, feisty young women, and they've already written him off because of the paragraph above. In the meantime, he is one of the creative catalysts of thewrongpeople.com, fuelling night-long drinking brainstorming sessions for new and unique ideas that we might share with you, the faceless consumer.